things i love thursday

"Relying on God has to begin all over again everyday as if nothing had yet been done." ~C.S. Lewis

What a week this has been! The beginning of January must have been the calm before the storm, because the past couple of weeks have picked up speed and had us looking forward to having a "sit down" on an evening we don't have to get back up and rush off somewhere. It's all been enjoyable, though, so I thought it was time for some things I love Thursday!

church family

First and foremost and all of the time. It's just one of those things I know I take for granted way too often, and being the pastor's daughter I sometimes get a glimpse of behind-the-scenes stuff that I should appreciate so much more. Last night we had our monthly church-wide meal before services. This month my mom and sister and I were cooking (aka my mom cooked and Amie and I helped wrap things up). We eat at 6pm, and at 5:15 all of the electricity went off in our county. I was putting dessert plates out, my mom was cutting cake, Amie was in another room. We don't have a backup generator and it was completely silent and totally dark. We felt around for our phones, turned on the flashlight, and kept plugging on. Thankfully, my mom's a prepare-er and everything was pretty much already ready. The Hostess Committee began to trickle in with their phone flashlights and while some of us held them up the rest of us filled cups, set out dessert, washed up the few remaining dishes, and got everything ready. More church members and men began showing up with flashlights and torches and shining headlights in the glass doors of our very, very dark gym. At 10 til 6 everything was done, we had enough bobbing lights and a big spotlight shining on the ceiling to see, and we prayed and went through line. It was a sweet picture to me of how a body works - each person did a different job to make sure it all got done, even though we were all experiencing the same "handicap". The lights came back on at 6:30 and we were able to clean everything up, start church on time, and proceeded as normal!

ballgames

But kind of only the home games. Our little church ball team has picked back up! We didn't have enough high school boys for a couple of years but this year they all got together and aren't too bad! We have another game tonight and they're always a lot of fun! With not a whole lot of "just-for-fun" things this time of the year, it's an enjoyable way to spend a winter evening.

the things kids say

"Miss Kelley, that's a pretty necklace, where did you get it?"

"To be honest [three year old] Mabel, I don't remember, but thank you."

"You are welcome."

"Lena Rae, while your brothers have a boy party [with about 20 of their friends they've been talking our ears off about] do you want to come play with me and A?"

"No, I want to go to the party."

"But you're a little girl."

"No, I want to go to the boy party, I'm a little boy."

"You're three, Lena Rae, you have to go to class."

"I want to go to the nursery, I'm two today."

"Ok, kids, someone tell me what your favorite part about tonight was."

"I wish we had played freeze tag! If we had played freeze tag, that would have been my favorite part!"

february
Sometimes it's alarming how quickly time passes. It's scary that we miss so many opportunities and I hate feeling like I can't keep up. Somehow though, I've been enjoying the passage of time this year. I have high hopes for 2017, and it feels like each new month brings a whole set of new possibilities.

my office
I got a new desk and rug and completely re-decorated! Yet another welcome and happy change. I just need to print some pictures and buy a fake plant or two (I've killed every real plant I've touched).

warm quilts | new books | Georgia cornbread | Dougy hugs (the definition of a bear hug) | Lena Rae dimples | the little boys' excitement | warm, sunny days | fresh air | group texts | my oil diffuser (I've even got one in my office! It makes the entire bottom floor smell like Thieves oil) | finally having short hair again | late night conversation with friends after church | planning ANOTHER baby shower - this time for Faith!!  | Wednesday night class - I love being a teacher's helper! | old pictures & videos - I've been so blessed to have grown up with the people I have!

back during our trip to Germany 5 years ago - the reason I started this blog!

I hope you all have a very lovely February! What are some things you're loving this Thursday?

pulling weeds | eve

Since my favorite thing to read and write are stories based around a person in the Bible and imagining things from their point of view, I've decided that once a month, or once every two months, I'll write a story based on someone in the Bible and post it on here to hold myself accountable to write something - if I don't post, you get to remind me! I've written a couple of stories about Mary, but in order to not "exhaust" a story line, I'm starting with Eve and seeing where it goes from there. I don't want to take too much liberty with the Bible, and nothing I write is "gospel truth". It's simply what I imagine as I sit and think about these people in the Bible.

Pulling weeds.

Day in and day out, pulling weeds with calloused and blistered hands. Hands that used to be perfect, entirely unmarred and exactly as they had been created. If there were a way to compare those hands today, you wouldn’t believe they belonged to the same person. But even beyond the scars, they were changing. The skin was looser, the veins more prominent. She’d never seen this process before, but she supposed as time had passed and she’d watched her sons grow up, she had been growing old.

Pulling weeds.

They were everywhere. In her garden, by the house, taking over the pastures, and worst of all, the most stubborn ones had rooted deep by the marker of Abel’s grave.

Ah, Abel. Just like the precious lamb that had been her first experience with death, he had only wanted to please. Gentle and caring…and gone. Her fault. Cain had simply acted out of the sin in his heart, sin that wouldn’t have existed had she not done the only thing she’d ever been told not to.

Everything was her fault.  Yanking, jerking, pulling weeds. They ripped her skin and drew blood. She remembered the first time she ever saw a weed. Thinking back now, she realized how pure her mind had been that she hadn’t even known what it was...but now, they were her closest enemy. They grew everywhere, entangling, ensnaring, and they had overgrown her heart many years ago.

“Adam, what are these?”

“They are weeds, Eve. They are punishment.”

It had been a direct slap in the face, as it should be. She placed no blame but that she put on herself, which was the entirety of it. Who knew what would come next? All she was sure of was that even after she was gone, generations would be paying the price for her sin. Generations of her offspring.

Pulling weeds.

Sweet, sweet Seth. There in the distance with his own little ones, sweating and working and paying the price. The babes to come next would do the same. She would die for them all if she could. She would lay it all down if it would take this horrible curse away.

They had no idea nor would they ever know what Eden was like. As the years passed, she and Adam had ceased talking about it. The children only began to resent them as they grew, and it didn’t change anything to talk about it. But there wasn’t an hour that went by that she didn’t ache for the peace of the Garden. There wasn’t a night she didn’t dream of the sweet water and lush food. There wasn’t a problem or joy that came up that she didn’t long to talk to the Lord about. It had been quiet for too long. They had been cut off from their closest friend, and His silence was unbearable.

If only the debt was payable and the curse could be lifted.

She owed too much. She regretted it all, every minute of every day.

Pulling weeds.

  

I struggled knowing how to end Eve's story. I usually finish what I write on a positive note, but after being exiled from the Garden of Eden, Eve's story wasn't a happy one. There is a price for sin, and regret is something you simply have to live with.

currently

It's 10:20pm and this is the first opportunity I've had today to get on my laptop. This post is as creative as I can get but a new years resolution is a new years resolution, and (at least until February) I'm determined to post every Thursday!

reading

Isaiah. Anyone else have trouble getting Genesis and January to align? I do the thing where I divide how many pages are in my Bible with 365, but it just never finishes exactly right. Sometimes I read extra, occasionally I don't get it all in, and sometimes I like to re-read passages. Whatever happened this time, I'm making my way through this book trying to pay extra attention this time and glean a little more. Please tell me I'm not the only one that goes slowly through the major prophets!

loving

Essential oils. Amie and I got Doterra diffusers for Christmas and my favorite one to diffuse right now is Thieves...or fighting five. It's the immune booster one, and no one's sick right now but I just love the scent! I have several blends but I want to get a few more individuals...does anyone have a favorite they'd like to recommend? I really want to try grapefruit soon. 

anticipating

Sunshine. It's been warm and rainy here which isn't the loveliest weather for January. I'd love some super low temps and snow, but a week of gray skies and foggy drives and wet everything, and right now all I can think about is warm sunshine.

grateful for

God's grace. An update on Collin - he came home the day after his crash to wait for the swelling in his face to go down - he even went to class this week and was at church Wednesday night! He had facial reconstructive surgery today and will probably get to go home late tomorrow afternoon. I can't think about it too much because I start crying every time. He really is a walking, talking miracle. He showed up in my office Wednesday night and as I hugged him I thanked God for the millionth time that he's still here. What a wake up call and reminder that Christ protects His children.

celebrating

Lena Rae. She turns three on Saturday - what?! For my birthday she gave me a night with just the two of us - coloring books, snacks, a movie and gift card to the candy store, and matching pj's. Her personality is so similar to mine at her age, and she and my nephews are growing up way too fast. I thought it was funny when my dad used to tell me he was going to put a brick on my head to make me stop growing...now I get it!

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! I'll be back next week.

this thursday

Happy Thursday, everyone.

This Thursday I feel a bit more appreciative of life. I know I talk about my friends a lot on here, but it's because I realize it's a rare thing to have so many close ones, and I don't ever want to take that blessing in my life for granted.

Genuine friends that I've had many deep conversations with. Friends I've cried with, shared heartbreak with, prayed with, and experienced growing up with.

And yesterday, one of those friends was in a plane crash.

It's a little unique because he's a pilot and he was flying his own plane. Last summer he did a transcontinental flight for his senior thesis. My sister and several of our friends have flown with him.

He's ok - I guess I should have mentioned that already! He's having surgery sometime today because he has severe face trauma, but he got out of the plane and even called his dad right after he crashed.

But I was just on my laptop, paying a bill, when my mom came in and said "Collin has crashed his plane."

And for a second, it felt like everything paused. The same thing happened a lot last fall when my PawPaw was so terribly sick. Every time we got a phone call and I saw my aunts or uncle's number on the caller ID there was a pause. A moment of you're either about to give me some more information or you're going to crush my heart.

"He's bruised and bloody but he was coherent. They're life flighting him to Vanderbilt."

Vanderbilt means serious. Vanderbilt means a good place with amazing care.

And that night sitting in the sanctuary after church when most people had left, we were all on our phones (incredibly rare at our church, we don't even bring them inside most of the time) comparing text updates, getting informed, no longer overly worried, but concerned and grateful.

These are my people. And I know if something bad were to happen to me, it would be the same. Group texts, prayer requests and updates flying back and forth, pictures being sent to those not on social media, so much care and concern, but more than anything, so much prayer.

I wondered if it would be strange for me to post this for everyone to read, especially since every time I post something my friends text, email, or let me know somehow that they read it and especially loved such-and-such part of it. They also point out when I mention "a friend" told me or sent me something that they know who it was! But I truly am grateful for all of them, and I don't think it's weird for me to put that on here. They know. We don't act all awkward about how thankful we are for our friendships, and they know I love them. I do not ever want to take any of them for granted.
 

Please keep Collin and his family and girlfriend in your prayers as he goes through surgery today and the healing process afterwards. You can check out his "Vin Fiz 2" flight here - his plane, "Molly" is the one that crashed.

twenty-four

Ten years ago this coming March, I wrote a letter to myself to be read when I turned 24. I'll be honest and say that when my mom found it during my 20th year I went ahead and read it. I stashed it away and forgot about it until I found it last spring and read it again. I put it in a visible place and haven't read it since then. 

Today is the day I had anticipated myself opening and reading it again for the first time all those years ago when I was fourteen - two months shy of finishing the eighth grade!

I thought I'd share it on here today as a reminder that through ups and downs and happinesses and sadnesses, time does pass. Sometimes it feels like it's standing still, but I remember this day so clearly and ten years have come and gone since sitting at my kitchen table with my journal/stationary book and penciling these words. 

Here we go! (I will take breaks for commentary on each paragraph.)

(Disclaimer: 14 year old me was a bit dramatic and still not that great at spelling!)

03-29-07

Dear 24,

Before this letter is thoughroly written or read, one question remains unasked: Have you been raptured? The Lord, if you're reading this on earth, has not yet come back, so let us proceed as normal.

One question remained...even though I'd just started the letter! I was obviously concerned about how much time I had left - and I remember thinking it was quite possible I could be reading it even if I'd been raptured!

How I envy who you are, 24! I long to grow up! Has the past ten years been what you dreamed of it? Is your name still Kelley [current last name] or Mrs. ______ _______? Have you yet been to Ireland, "Oh, land o' your secret dreams?" What has life given you, what have you given life?

Ah, 14, how I envy YOU! No, the past ten years haven't been all I dreamed they would be when I was 14. If you knew then where you would be now, you might be terribly disappointed. But you haven't yet learned the lessons I have, and this side of some of those dreams yet to be realized really isn't so bad as you might imagine. I haven't been to Ireland, though I wish I could remember where it was I read that line! Incorrectly used, Miss Fourteen - everyone has always known you want to go to Ireland. Maybe someday. You'll go to Australia, though, and Germany and Hawaii and so many beautiful places. They were all so much more than you ever imagined. The Lord has given me much, I have not given back nearly enough.

Are you truly happy, Kelley of 24? Is your heart content, full of love? Does your face wear the smile of peace, and harmony with all? Examine yourself, coveted 24. Who are you, what have you become. Do you, 24, brim over with life, compassion, and joy? Do it. Whatever you need to confess, say, or make known, do it. Before it's too late.

Yes, very very happy. You can't imagine how full of love your heart can get - in two years you'll become an aunt! It's the very best thing you'll experience. 

Months ago that peace was a little elusive, today it is very present. I have become someone who knows that God's will won't always make sense but that peace is a wonderful sign that you're in it. I don't know if I "brim over" with it, but I'm very excited about life and the time and window of opportunity I've been given.

And seriously. Stop being so worried about time.

I'll close with one last warning: Youth is happiness. Never forget, or forsake your youth. Friends that are true, come from your youth. And family ALWAYS MUST come first. Remember that, my blessed 24. Always remember.

"One last warning" - what was the first one? ;) 

Getting older is also happiness, 14. You will LOVE your 20's (except for maybe 23, but 24 is shaping up quite nicely)! Your friends will change, but that's ok. When you are 16 everything will kind of flip-flop. When you are 17 you will make friends who edify you. When you are 18 and 19 you will discover that those friends will be with you through everything. They will cry with you when your heart is broken and they will pray for you as you find your different paths. You will become friends with their significant others and you will love their babies to death. Your family will mean more to you with each passing year. Just wait, 14. It doesn't look like you're imagining, but just gets better and better.

Always remember the dream: PUBLISHED!

Ha! Now there's a dream that's changed. You will eventually realize you aren't a... novelist? Novel writer? You will realize that you don't enjoy writing novels as much as you love exploring the intricacies of day-to-day emotions and growth and experiences. You will start this blog where you can write whatever you feel like and "publish" it yourself.

I wish for you courage, determination, and happiness.

I am now of the past,

14

I then listed on a separate page my likes (reading and writing), what I was wearing (my brother's old basketball jersey), what my family was doing (getting ready for my brother's wedding), my best friends, and who my crush was at that time - in very tiny letters at the bottom of the page. Some things are still embarrassing! ;)

It's fun to see what I was hoping for and how things have changed. In a lot of ways I don't even feel like the same person! Maybe I'll write a dear 34...or maybe dear 30 so I can open it sooner!

my heart is definitely full

Christmas to Me

One of my favorite Christmas songs is by a group I really cannot recommend, but it played on Pandora last year and I really liked it. It's called "That's Christmas to Me", and it just reminded me that while there are so many holiday traditions, the special ones are the ones that each family has for themselves.

Christmas can be a bit of a touchy subject in Christian groups. Celebrate or don't celebrate? Tree or no tree? Christmas music or no?

While my family does celebrate Christmas, and we do set up a tree, and I've had my Christmas cd's playing on repeat, I have several friends who don't, and that's ok. We don't try to shove our beliefs on each other, and we respect the differences in opinion.

But do you know what Christmas is to me?

It's not about unwrapping presents, it's about spending the time picking out those perfect gifts that let the other person know you've been listening, that you truly do know them - likes, dislikes, wants, and needs. You heard, and wanted to do something special for those special people. This year, I'm most excited to give my mom her gift. In one way I want her to open it right now, but in another way, I want to put it off as long as possible because once everything's been given, the excitement of anticipation is over.

Anticipation. That's my most favorite part. The weeks leading up to the 25th. For us, it starts on Thanksgiving Day putting up the tree and the lights and all the decorations. In the following weeks we go shopping, we bake, we stay up late watching Christmas movies. I wish it lasted 2 months, if I'm being honest - it goes by way too fast!

Christmas is about family and friends, and spending quality with those you love the most. It's helping others who are maybe a little lonely or have a little less. 

It's telling the story of Christ's birth over and over while Lena Rae moves our nativity magnets where they go. Mary and "Jophus" making the trip to Bethlehem to have baby Jesus, the angel telling the shepherds who were watching their sheep to find the sleeping baby, and the wise men from the east following the star that pointed to Jesus. Then we move it to the other side of the fridge as we tell it again.

It's our quiet Christmas Day (which we spend as Christmas Eve), playing games, eating good food, and ending with "It's a Wonderful Life". I cannot tell you how much I love this movie, I truly look forward to watching it every year and I don't think Christmas would be the same to me without it.  "Remember, no man is a failure who has friends."

cousins! matching was a BIG deal :)

It's making Stromboli with the kids and buying them pajamas to wear while we drive around town with our hot chocolate looking at Christmas lights. They're old enough now to remember and realize that it's an annual tradition, and their excitement makes me even more excited. Just the aunts and our nephews and niece! 

I always try to take some extra time to contemplate (and usually write) about Mary and Joseph and what the birth of Jesus must have been like for them. There's no way to even come close to imagining carrying the maker of your own body inside of that body. To nourish and clothe and raise the One who gave you life. If I had the chance to sit down and talk to Mary and ask her questions and hear her stories, I would never stop listening. I would always want to know more. 

Christmas doesn't have to look the same for everyone - indeed, I hope it doesn't! But I do hope you don't get caught up in the commercialism of it. The stress and worry of trying to get everyone you know a present. My friends and I try to get together for coffee or just a talk, but we made a "no gift" rule several years ago because that's just not what it's all about. 

Anyway, I just wanted to tell you a bit of what Christmas is to me and I hope you have a very merry one. I will be spending it in church with my very large "extended" family! Thank you for reading, and I'll "see" you in 2017.

december

This might be my last post for 2016. It's been a busy month, but the next two weeks are relatively empty, and even though that's (usually) when I post more, I think I want to focus 100% on family time and Christmas baking. 

So far December has been a busy month, and for me, that's made it even happier. I can tend to be a slightly obsessive person, especially when it comes to over thinking, so when I'm busy and focused on something else, that's when I'm happiest. If my brain isn't occupied with things in my control, it's way too occupied with things that are out of my control!

We started the month off with a bang during Missions Conference. I feel like I probably say it every year, but this year was my favorite. It was our 25th Conference, every single missionary was friendly, sweet, and really bared their hearts to us during their presentations. It doesn't always happen that way, but I just fell in love with all of them. The countries represented were New Zealand, Botswana, Papua New Guinea, the Republic of Georgia, Trinidad, and from our own missionaries, Ethiopia, Fiji, Indonesia, and Belize (our missionaries to Australia came last year!) 

As I type this, I'm halfway curled up around the space heater in my office. Monday night of the Conference (it goes Sun.- Wed.), we had a rather big *ahem* leak in the basement where all of our offices are. It didn't affect the meeting in the slightest, but it ruined the flooring in 3 offices and the entire lobby. We're nearly done replacing it all but mine will be last and I've gone from carpet to bare concrete and it's currently 26°! I'm upgrading from carpet to tile and a nice rug though, so I can't complain. :)

Jace turned 8 on the 5th, and I might have been a little tiny bit emotional about it. He's up to my shoulder now, and he's reading chapter books and looks a little snaggle-toothed.

a seven year difference

Lena Rae's best friend, her cousin Sophie, came a couple of nights to the conference. They're 11 months apart in age (Sophie's older) and such happy little girls together. Sophie has six brothers, Lena Rae has four, so they just love being around each other (they've managed to be the girliest of girls despite - actually, because of - being surrounded by boys).

 

Sophie on the left, LR on the right

 

To "wrap it up", here's a summary of Christmas parties this month:

Saturday (10th) - my Sunday School class took a trip to Bellbuckle, TN. 

That was a morning/afternoon event, and that night at 5:00 I headed two minutes down the road to help my friends get ready for their Christmas party  - ugly sweaters, gag gifts, and a waffle bar with all kinds of holiday beverages!

of course I had to buy her baby Klay an ugly Christmas sleeper!

Last night in my Wednesday night class (I'm the "helper" for the 8 & 9 year olds), we had a fun party - I provided snacks and made my own favorites, cookies & milk and apple pie apples. No pics because they all have the kids in them, but the teacher had the cutest games and it was a lot of fun!

Friday (16) - my next door neighbor is "hosting" a Christmas party - he's single, so a bunch of the girls in our group are kind of taking over and making a bunch of soup and we're going to just hang out and play games. It's also my parents 38th anniversary! (but they've been together for 40 years. that's a really long time)

Saturday (17) - Christmas at my grandparents! This takes most of the day and is so relaxing and fun. We play white elephant and the little ones get stockings. We eat a big breakfast, then after playing the game have a "snack extravaganza" for lunch - we all bring finger foods and it's chaotic madness but great fun. (4 kids = 17 grandkids =  = 8 great grandkids + a slew of in-laws and a great aunt = lots of people)

Sunday (18) - we have our annual Open House for the members of our church after the evening service. That's a lot of people in our home, but it's a lot of fun! It is slightly overwhelming, but our church family is very sweet and no one really stays overly late so while a lot goes into preparing and it's a little loud, it's also a lot of fun.

Monday (19) - Amie and I will have our "Christmas Party with the Aunts" with the kids. Now THAT'S a lot of fun! Strombolli and pj's and games and a Christmas movie and snacks! 

And THEN we can sleep until Christmas! (just kidding ;) ) We will be having church on Christmas Day, so everyone is coming over on the 26th for our family celebration. I can wait. My favorite part is the build up, the anticipation, the whole atmosphere of this time of year. I hope you've had a lovely December, it truly is a wonderful life!