our little one

Willa Marie

December 21, 2019

 2:45am

8 lb. 4 oz. 21.5 in.

The best gift of all.

just a little update

"Baby J" due December 17, 2019

I don't know how many people follow my blog that didn't already know we're expecting, but surprise! I went back and forth about whether or not to make an "online announcement" before the baby was born, but I decided enough people know already that I might as well. 

We waited 12 weeks before telling our families and 16 weeks before telling anyone else. It was so much fun having that sweet little secret between just the two of us and I honestly wanted to wait a lot longer than that. However, when you're sick all the time and starting to randomly get swollen, those things become a bit harder to conceal!

For fun, I thought I'd include the answers to the questions I get asked most frequently...

"How far along are you?"

28 weeks! That means we have 12 weeks left if the baby shows up right on time, which is rare.

"How have you been feeling?"

Pretty good right now. I had all day sickness for about 15 weeks but now the only thing I deal with is heartburn and reflux in the evenings. Oh, and intense swelling thanks to the 90+ degree days we're still consistently having, hence the reason I cropped my feet out of that photo! I can't do anything about my puffy face, oh well! (Yes, I've tried putting my feet up, staying out of the heat, moving around, and laying on my left side. I'm drinking around a gallon to a gallon and a half of water every day so at this point it's just a "hold out til the baby's born" thing!)

"What's the gender?"

We don't know! I've never wanted to find out, but it took some convincing for Brandon. I'm loving the added anticipation and I think it will help me get through the final stretch. (The heart rate has stayed right around 140 for those who like to try to guess gender that way.)

"Do you have names picked out?"

We do, but not even our family knows what they are. We've had names picked out since long before we even started trying and we haven't wavered yet!

"What have you been craving?"

Nothing crazy, really. My favorites have always been those of a twelve year old - pizza, hot dogs, french fries, ice cream...now I just want MORE of those things! I've been enjoying chicken salad and dill pickles more than usual too. Big babies run on both sides of our families so I've tried to watch my weight as much as I can but the swelling is adding water weight I can't control. (None of my cravings point towards boy or girl either, according to all the old wives tales.) Oh, and I guess if I gave in to my REAL craving it would be a McDonald's cheeseburger, fries, and mocha frappe every single day. I can't and wouldn't do that but...I may have given in once or twice.

"Have you been feeling the baby a lot?"

Not much at first, but definitely a lot more now that it's getting bigger. Neither me nor Brandon were very hyper children, so it doesn't surprise me that our baby isn't super active. But it is a very amazing (and very weird haha) sensation!

I'm in my third trimester now and very ready for December! Brandon has been the very best during this journey. Making sure the kitchen was clean and "scent free" during those long weeks of sickness, and sending me back to bed the mornings after I've tossed and turned all night. We're surrounded by family and I couldn't have asked for a better pregnancy experience. My sister-in-law Tara is expecting as well and is due just a few weeks before me! 

We are SO excited! Life is flying by and I know December will be here before I know it. I hope you all had a wonderful summer and enjoy a lovely fall!

home

I heard an old song a few days ago that put the subject of home on my mind and I haven't been able to get it off. It's a secular song so I won't recommend it, but it basically talks about the person you love feeling like home. It reminded me of a quote I sent Brandon once that said, "Falling for him wasn't falling at all. It was walking into a house and suddenly knowing you're home."

I remember the night before our wedding sitting on the floor of my old bedroom weeping as I said "goodbye" to the room that had become my haven the past several years. I was at home with my parents until I was 25 and both of my brothers had been moved out for years. The second floor of our house had become somewhat of a secluded place for me and my sister as we had become adults and each of our rooms had our stamp, our touches, our comfort. It was without a doubt "my happy place" filled with my books and journals and pictures and memories on top of memories of hours spent reading, praying, dreaming, hoping. I had said a teary goodnight to my family but as I prepared for bed and the house grew silent I simply sat on the floor, leaned against my bed, and cried for about 20 minutes bidding farewell to the only place I'd ever called home.

One of my favorite quotes is by Anatole France and says, "All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another."

Marriage was a much longed for change for me, but there was definitely some melancholy and I did expect to experience a little homesickness the first few weeks. Surprisingly it never happened. There was once, maybe a month or so after the wedding, that I was back home one afternoon to pick up some things that it got to me just a little. My mom was in the kitchen and I ran up to my old room. I passed Amie reading in her room across the hall and entered the bedroom that at that point still looked just as I had left it. There was a split second that it all hit me that this part of my life - this very big part - was over forever. There was no coming back. But I had already grieved, and someone else had quickly become my home.

Eleven short months later Amie was on her honeymoon. Brandon went on a 3-day ski trip and my dad was preaching an out of town meeting so my mom and I both found ourselves alone in our houses. Given the opportunity to spend a couple of nights in my old bed I came to the surprising realization that it just didn't feel like mine anymore. Whether my house was empty or not, I had created a new space that I was attached to. This place had Brandon's things, Brandon's smell, and if I was going to be without him for a few days I wanted to be in  a place where I still felt him.

Now, six months later as we take more and more steps to starting our "forever home", the place we are now feels more temporary than ever. We've been saying "I can't wait til..." and "It's going to be so nice to..." We never wanted to feel too attached to a rental and I can safely say we have succeeded. But it has been a home for us and it will continue to be for the next several months.

Last night as we laid in bed I listened to Brandon's deep breathing and felt a panic sweep over me. It's been a tough few weeks. We've both been sick and it's been a struggle trying to get better. It's been incredibly hot and we've been wiped out. I'll admit, I've done an extraordinary amount of complaining. But last night, laying there, I couldn't get out of my mind how much I love this life we have. My dad's messages yesterday were on suffering, and with so much of it around us I feel so incredibly blessed, so thankful for these things I do not deserve. My feelings of panic came with the knowledge that this too, is temporary.

We have another home waiting for us. My PawPaw is there. Brandon's Gramma is there. Our grandparents, our parents, so many people we know and love are anxious to be there too. But me? I like my home here. Perhaps I'm too attached. I'm not afraid of dying, I'm not afraid of my eternal dwelling place. I have simply been so blessed by a merciful God, and I am enjoying those blessings with every fiber of my being. I know there is better waiting but my small, carnal mind just can't imagine much better right now. And so this is how I imagine heaven. It's home. I know enough to know that it won't be like I expect, but if I imagine it different I can't fathom it being as good. So to me, it is my home, it is the people I love and am loved by. It is this life I have but without sin and temptation, worry or anxiety.

I hope we can all come to the place where we see our sufferings as God's purification. Where we see the small blessings as infinite joys. Where we can make a beautiful home with our meager earthly belongings, while looking towards a home our finite minds simply can't comprehend.

Heaven will be our best day ever, magnified and multiplied. Heaven is home, and home is the greatest blessing I know.

a new year

As I sit here looking at this blank screen wondering what in the world to write, I realize it's been seven years since I started this blog.

I began it as a way to document my missions trip with my friends to Germany so our church family back home could stay in touch. Then I recapped the trip, and as weeks passed I realized missionaries and far-away friends were using it as a way to keep up with our lives here in middle Tennessee.

It became an outlet for the times I wanted to write creatively, a place to spill my heart when I felt surely someone out there could relate, and a place to put pictures of the growth and change that was happening around me.

Today, it is January the second, seven years later. Back then I was a few months from leaving my teen years behind, today I am a few days away from turning 26. If you scan the past few years of this blog's posts you will see a common theme of waiting on the Lord, learning to be patient, questioning the trials He requests from us, the process of a healing heart, and waiting again. And then this past year, I announced my engagement and marriage all in the span of about one month.

God is so gracious to us. This past year has been indescribable. I never would have imagined the smooth transition from being single to marriage. I wouldn't have dreamed Brandon and I would have settled into a new routine and living together as quickly and smoothly as we did. I know it was God's hand on us, His leading us every step of the way.

I'm excited to see what 2019 holds! 2018 was a big year for change, and I imagine this one will be as well. We purchased some land last month, and will be navigating saving, building, and everything that comes along with this new adventure very soon. I will try to post more, include you in our lives and keep you updated on the happenings here in middle Tennessee. 

Thank you for sticking with me via this blog. As infrequently as I post, it is still something I very much enjoy and always look forward to hearing from you.

Have a happy new year, friends!

Christmas Day 2018

lately

Where has the time gone? I had plans to post more often since August, but it went by so fast. I suppose for now this is a "hit or miss" blog, but in 2019 I want to be much more diligent with it.

Right after my last post we celebrated Brandon's birthday at the most beautiful campground near where we live. He'd been talking about camping and they'd been so busy with work so I secretly made the reservation, bought an air mattress, tent, and food, and asked him to take a Saturday off. We spent Friday night there and his family was able to join us for supper Saturday evening. I'm not going to lie, I'm not much of a camping person, and next time we'll use a bigger tent because there wasn't much ventilation in ours! August is a muggy time of year for us, so I'd love to go in May or October sometime!

first weekend in August

Thanksgiving was so much fun! We spent Thursday at my parent's, Friday with my mom's and dad's families, and Saturday at Brandon's parent's. It was a very tiring 3 days, but I'm so grateful to have both of our families close. I don't ever want to take it for granted!

finally home after three days going back-and-forth

While at his parent's house we walked out on their land and picked out our Christmas tree. We were keeping our tiny living room in mind but even the smallest tree in the field was huge in our home! Brandon took it outside and trimmed it a few times and now we have our extra-large Charlie Brown tree and I love it!

Getting it inside Saturday night!

finally decorating after trimming it 3 times

I'll probably do a Christmas house tour sometime because I'm loving the way it looks right now and want it to stay up all the time!

The first weekend in December we went down to Decatur, TN to have Thanksgiving and Christmas with my mother-in-law's family. Brandon and I headed down a day early and got an Airbnb in Chattanooga. We hadn't gone anywhere overnight together since our honeymoon so it was nice to take our time driving down and eating at City Cafe.

stopping at an overlook on the drive down

This past Sunday (December 16) was my parent's 40th wedding anniversary and marked one year since Brandon proposed. It's crazy to me to think that amount of time has gone by!

And now it's time to wrap Christmas gifts (I'm done shopping!), listen to Christmas music non-stop, bake lots of goodies, and enjoy this last week before Christmas. I'm ready for it to slow down. I would love for time to just crawl by this next week. I know that's a pipe dream, but isn't it a lovely one?

Candid photos are my favorite but we never have any of us because every photo we take has to be a selfie! Amie (who's getting married in 3.5 weeks!! Jan. 11) took our Christmas card photo (which I'll share later), and when I got my phone back I found a couple of candids. One was of him getting a bug out of my hair so I'll keep that facial expression to myself, but I liked these!

I can't remember if it was my dad or Isaac or both that interrupted our "photo session" here

I thought he was looking at me, but he was trying to figure out what was stuck in my hair haha

I hope you're all having a terrific holiday season! It's truly the most wonderful time of the year.

things i love thursday

I haven't done one of these in awhile, and it just seemed like it was time. I truly want to post more, but there isn't always a lot to say. There are always plenty of blessings to count though, and I need to do that more often than I do.

Evenings.

I've always liked the day's end - especially in the summer. It's still warm enough to meander outside barefoot, still light enough to sit on the porch and see who you're talking to, and with the dishes drying in the rack and the to-do list cleared, it's finally a time to truly relax. I appreciate the evenings even more since getting married, because with Brandon heading out at 5:30am our time together in the morning is very short and sleepy!

4th of July.

I don't know if I've ever mentioned it on here, but the 4th of July is right up there with my favorite holidays - Thanksgiving, Christmas, and July 4th. This year it fell on a Wednesday and our church had hotdogs and watermelon and a really nice fireworks show. We celebrated with my family the Saturday before and everyone was able to make in to my parents' house for a big cookout! It's just such a nice, pressure-free holiday and I love it!

You can tell Douglas wasn't the biggest fan of the fireworks ;)

Babysitting.

We got to keep Lena Rae and Dougy at our house for a few evenings in July and it was a lot of fun. They aren't a bit shy (they were for a little while right after the wedding) and we really enjoyed our time with them. Between the two of us we have 3 nieces and 4 nephews so we're getting lots of aunt and uncle practice! One of the evenings we had Lena Rae and Dougy my aunt brought her little girl Sophie to play and that was just extra fun - she and Lena Rae are the best of friends!

Uncle Brandon scoring all kinds of points reading books when he was already hoarse from working in the heat :)

We can walk to the river from our house so we took them for an after supper "adventure".

Dougy, Lena Rae, & Sophie

Heirlooms.

My grandma lets each of her granddaughters pick out one of her crystal bowls when they get married or to a certain age, and I finally picked mine out a few weeks ago! The first thing I put in it was a bright pretty salad.

I also have this pitcher that belonged to my great-grandmother who I'm named after. I absolutely LOVE this one!

Engagements.

My little sister, y'all. Amie's boyfriend (now fiance) Isaac proposed last Saturday night and it's still a little weird to me! I'm so excited for them, but now I kind of know how my big brothers felt when I got married. They don't have a wedding date yet, but already this year there are 5 weddings of people at Cornerstone, so if they decide on 2018 they'll make number 6!

He was texting me about rings Saturday morning - I had no idea it would all happen in one day!

I could go on and on about this summer because it's been a full one, but we've got fun plans this weekend so I'll just save all of that for another post next week. I hope you all have a lovely day - just one more work day to go then we've made it to the weekend!!

year of change

If anyone actually still comes to check this page I will be surprised. Somewhere along the way this blog slipped out of my mind and I simply haven't sat down and taken the time to write.

We've loved using those gift cards from the wedding for date nights! This was at the Chophouse.

I thought once we got past the wedding and settled into our new routine I would come up with a weekly or monthly schedule and post frequently, but then summer hit and time got short, and, well, those are my excuses!

Easter Sunday

June 10 Brandon and I went back to the Mexican restaurant where we had our first date. It was funny to me to think we were marking one year of dating when we'd already been married nearly four months! Time has moved so quickly and so much has happened in such a little while.

 

McDonald's DOES count as a picnic sometimes ;) Especially when you want to try all their new sauces!

Summer is, as always, my favorite time of year. Despite the weird little bugs we keep finding in our house and the gnats slowly growing in number and the mosquito bites and crops of poison ivy it remains the best season of all in my mind! Saturday picnics at the park, a date night here and there, Icees, fishing, simply sitting on the porch swing, fresh fruit, homemade ice cream...I'm trying to intentionally enjoy summer more this year because I blinked once on our honeymoon and here we are in nearly July!

playing Jenga - our guestbook!

To update you on our lives...

We spent a week in Northern Ireland for our honeymoon and it was everything I could've ever hoped for! We stayed in a cottage near the sea, and although it was 78° in Tennessee on our wedding day it snowed every day we were in Ireland. We slept in, ate in cozy "pubs" (had our fair share of fish-n-chips!), and drove along the coastline. We're both quiet people and very much enjoyed listening to their friendly, lilting accents as many of them engaged us in conversation and wanted to know about where we were from and why we were there! It was one of the most beautiful places I have ever been, and it will forever hold a special place in my heart. One of our friends from church is from Northern Ireland and we stayed in the town his parents live in. They had us over for dinner our first night there and it was a comfort to know there were friends close by should we need anything.

snow outside of the restaurant we ate lunch at after miles of walking, white flowers at the castle we visited, sheep everywhere!, view of the Irish sea on our way "home"

driving on the wrong side, $5 lunch (so. much. food.), the cottage we rented, another snowy drive, freezing at the Harbour

Giant's Causeway, snow at a roadside stop, dinner at the "Mermaid" restaurant (coastal town)

to get closer to the airport in Dublin, we found this castle just 15 minutes away to spend our last night in!

Since then work has picked up for him and I've gotten busier helping with summer camps and other ministries our church has during the summer months. Saturdays off are precious and Sunday afternoon naps are almost tradition now. Cooking for two has been an adventure but I'm starting to get the hang of it! (Mostly thanks to the freezer that was a wedding gift from my brother!)

It's so nice to live 15 minutes from his parents, 10 from mine, and about 2 from the church! He works with his brother every day and I get to see Amie a lot since she teaches piano at the church some. Prayers I was afraid to pray have been answered in such numerous ways and some afternoons when I'm home alone I can be found tearing up because I remember the times I wept and prayed for the things God has given me today. Time, prayer, waiting...it's all worth it, just like everyone always tells you!

I hope you all have a beautiful summer and hopefully you'll be "hearing" from me again soon!

where i've been

If I have any readers left I'll be amazed. Five months is a long time in between posts and if it were a blog I follow, I might have stopped checking back for a new one by now too!

So where have I been and why have I not posted? Since August I've been doing the same things. Being an aunt, working at the church, and I haven't traveled anywhere. But my mind has been focused on something altogether different.

Life changes quickly, doesn't it? And sometimes you can be waiting on something and suddenly all the pieces fall together and God opens your eyes at exactly the second He wants them to be open. You see new possibilities that were there all along, but the timing just wouldn't have been right yet. God asks us to wait for reasons. Beautiful, happy, and yes, life changing reasons.

I'm not going to go into many details yet because something in me still cherishes keeping  my thoughts close to my heart and maybe it's old fashioned or silly, but I don't always want to put a lot of pictures and every little detail out into the public like the majority of the world does now.

But just in case anyone checks back here once in a blue moon, I wanted to put on here that the biggest life change is yet to come. February 23, 2018, I will be changing my last name!

It all started back on June 10 with our first date. On December 16 I said "yes!" (or more precisely, "yes, thank you!") and it's been a bit of a whirlwind getting everything ready in such a short amount of time. If you have any questions please feel free to leave a comment or send me an email and I'll try to get to it as soon as I can!

Because we're both old souls and don't remember to take pictures I only have one of the two of us that we took right after he proposed. I do have this one though that I really wanted to share because like my dad kept telling me, "it's probably right under your nose!"

I'm the girl in the bright striped dress. My fiance Brandon is standing slightly behind me to the left. 

This picture was taken over 20 years ago.

God is so good, isn't He?  He's always working behind the scenes to line everything up so we'll be ready when the time comes.

I'm hoping to write a longer post soon talking about Christmas, my birthday, my brand new niece Josie, and other things, but those might have to wait until after February ;) 

 

august

August is slipping away. How is it that I started out so strong with blogging this year, and then as life began to "slow down" I stopped? I think maybe because as I get older, the less I feel the need to share my thoughts and life online. As time marches on, I do think about this blog and have the desire to keep posting, keep writing, keep updating. But life is changing, and as my priorities have shifted, this blog isn't anywhere close to the top anymore. If you still enjoy reading, I do thank you. I will keep posting, but clearly, just not as frequently and I won't make any promises of how often. 

I think one of the reasons I've slowed down is a simple lesson that time has taught me. Once you've said something - especially on the internet - it cannot be taken back. Once a picture is shared, it can't be unseen. I'm not really ashamed or embarrassed by anything I've ever shared on here, I just know that I want to stay guarded in this world that knows no boundaries. There have been enough times in my life that I look back on and cringe. I don't want to put those moments in a place where they cannot be erased. Once words leave your mouth - or fingers, in this case - they can only be forgiven, rarely are they forgotten.

The months of June, July, and August have fallen through my fingers like grains of sand. One moment I had a tight grip, the next they were gone entirely. I have been overwhelmed by God's grace and goodness. At the age of 24, I have begun to experience things that force me to look to Christ and pay more attention to Him than the circumstances around me. I feel as if these days my main request is for wisdom, while last year I had a bucketful of questions I couldn't even find words for. God can pull us out of our confusion and place us in peace if only we can adjust our focus on Him. I'm still trying, still learning, and a lot of the time it's still a struggle. Trust is simple, really, if we can just only let go of our own weak grasp on control.

On Father's Day, we were given a tangible gift that represented the answer to a specific prayer prayed for so many years. In February, 2018, my oldest brother Stephen and his wife Tara will add a little baby to our family!

July included the wedding of a close friend, and lots of swim days with my niece and nephews. August came and brought with it my friend Faith's sweet baby Judah and a huge creek baptism for our church. Jackson was baptized with several others that day, and who cares that all of us on the bank were hot and sweaty? There's such a sweetness about an old fashioned creek baptizing.

Monday was the day of the great solar eclipse, and we just so happened to live right in the path of totality. As long as I live, I will never forget that day. The photos below were all taken within a few minutes of each other, and the bottom one was around 1:28pm. Two minutes later, it was bright and hot again, but for those two minutes the crickets chirped, stars and lightening bugs came out, and we were surrounded by a 360° sunset. As goosebumps covered my arms I stood in awe of God's creation. How sweet that in a world such as ours, He still stuns the world with the evidence of His existence. How sad that some refuse to see it.

I suppose we're in the "dog days of summer", but as it cools off and September approaches with it's structure and schedules, I hope each of you enjoy it. Thank you for reading even though it's silent on here so often and my writing style refuses to stay the same. I really do appreciate it!

patience

My dad was preaching at a church a couple of hours from home recently, and since it wasn't far away we all loaded up and went. Usually him preaching at a different church means we may hear a sermon we've heard before, but that's ok, even the same outline is completely different from church to church.

This particular time he gave a bit of his testimony and the history of Cornerstone. Now, this doesn't change, but I could listen to it over and over again. When he first came to the town we live in now, he was still in the convention. After his trial sermon, and older lady shook his hand and told him she'd been praying for him for twenty years. Since he'd only just met her, this was a bit confusing. After looking at her a bit confused, she said, "You don't understand, I've been praying for a Bible believing pastor for twenty years." That would have been around the time my dad was eight years old - the age he was when his abusive, alcoholic father passed away. This lady may have been praying for a pastor, but that pastor turned out to be my dad - and those twenty years in his life had involved several major car accidents, the way too early death of his mother, suicidal thoughts, salvation, the call to preach, marriage, college, seminary...you see where I'm going.

Due to a stand on the KJV and a few other issues, a few years later, my dad was asked to resign that church. He handed in his resignation, and when he and my mom got to the parsonage there was a group of people waiting for him. They wanted to start a church. An independent, King James only, Baptist church. Mrs. Hailey, our valiant prayer warrior, was part of that group. They first met in a tent, then a community church building that was falling apart, and then in '94 they moved into the newly built building we're still in debt free.

Today, Cornerstone has been going strong for 25.5 years. We've expanded our sanctuary 3 times, built a gym, a Missions House, a residents house, and a Sunday School building. We're at full capacity - and to be honest, we're probably beyond that but the only way to get more room will be an entirely new building for a bigger sanctuary. I don't say any of this boastfully because God has a different time frame for every person and every church, but I say it to illustrate the great power there is in fervent and heartfelt prayer.

Now, I've heard that story my entire life. I'm 24 and our church was established one year before I was born. I don't remember Mrs. Hailey but I've seen her prayer journal and my mom wears her ring. For some reason, sitting in that church that night, the twenty years she'd spent praying stood out to me. Twenty years is a long time. I wonder if God had given her any signs that her prayer would eventually be answered or if her faith was strong enough that she didn't need one. Growing up hearing about her, I feel confident it was the latter.

She isn't around today, she didn't get to see that our biggest "problem" is our growth - and how can that be considered a problem? People have moved from states away to attend Cornerstone...and all of the credit goes to God, but what if she had given up? There have been things I've prayed about for going on five years, and I feel like my answer must be a "no" because I've seen no progress, but what about Mrs. Hailey? The fruit of her prayers continues to produce more fruit. I think, if she could see Cornerstone Baptist Church today, she would be utterly delighted.

She prayed, and God had a plan. She had patience, and God provided in due time. 

This is a time a great turmoil and great opportunity in America. It's a time for action, but there's never a moment we can give up praying. When I think it's a lost cause, I remember Mrs. Hailey. Twenty years of prayers for the same thing. Can I be as faithful?

God may not answer our prayers in our time frame, and I've told Him a time or two how much that frustrates me, but His plan is much more complex than we can see. Our prayers may be helping someone we've never met. We may not get to witness the fruit of our prayers in our lifetime, but I sure am grateful for Mrs. Hailey. Without her prayers my life would probably be entirely different. I feel like there's a generation of people in our church my age and younger who are the products of her and seventy-something other people who stepped out on faith and prayer into the power of God. How can I not hope to do the same for a future generation?

"Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen."

EPHESIANS 3:20-21

making lemonade

My PawPaw is well known for loving lemon flavored anything. He's also famous for his dislike of chocolate, but he passed on the "lemon love" to his children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.

A couple of months ago on his 85th birthday the dessert table was covered in lemon cake, lemon meringue pie, lemon cookies, and a gallon of sweetly tart iced lemonade sat to the side. One of his gifts was a yellow basket filled with more lemon snacks than I had ever seen. 

But although I could carry on about my PawPaw or my family or my favorite lemon treats for awhile, that's not really what's on my mind.

A package came into the mail today and I noticed the return address was from a long time family friend of ours. Whenever I think of this lady, I'm encouraged to be better. I always remember my mom describing her at a ladies' meeting several years ago as someone who'd been handed some lemons and was making lemonade.

I know we've all heard this saying, but I'll be honest and admit that the few tiny little lemons that have come my way haven't been made into lemonade right off the bat. I puckered up and sucked the bitterness for awhile, even though I much prefer a little sugar and water added.

The thing is, it's up to us to add the sweetness. To hold the lemons in our hands, whether we expected to receive them or not, and make a decision about what to do with them. God has given us the things we need to sweeten them up, and He's given us the free will to make that choice.

I know so many people who have made gallon after gallon of lemonade, I know people who are currently making a few batches. But there are also those who display their lemons and announce how terrible they are, holding onto them and protecting their bitter flavor. They carelessly squeeze out the juice, infecting others with the bitterness.

Everyone wants to be friends with the person offering free lemonade. It's a classic favorite! It just cannot be made authentically without a few sour lemons. 

I don't have any more metaphoric examples to give right off the top of my head, although I'm sure there are so many. This was just a thought I had on my mind today and I wanted to share it. 

The sun is supposed to come back out tomorrow so I think I'll make a batch of lemonade for my nephews and niece. I hope you each have a lovely weekend with just the right amount of sweetness!

one last chance to play with the moon sand

things i love thursday

"Relying on God has to begin all over again everyday as if nothing had yet been done." ~C.S. Lewis

What a week this has been! The beginning of January must have been the calm before the storm, because the past couple of weeks have picked up speed and had us looking forward to having a "sit down" on an evening we don't have to get back up and rush off somewhere. It's all been enjoyable, though, so I thought it was time for some things I love Thursday!

church family

First and foremost and all of the time. It's just one of those things I know I take for granted way too often, and being the pastor's daughter I sometimes get a glimpse of behind-the-scenes stuff that I should appreciate so much more. Last night we had our monthly church-wide meal before services. This month my mom and sister and I were cooking (aka my mom cooked and Amie and I helped wrap things up). We eat at 6pm, and at 5:15 all of the electricity went off in our county. I was putting dessert plates out, my mom was cutting cake, Amie was in another room. We don't have a backup generator and it was completely silent and totally dark. We felt around for our phones, turned on the flashlight, and kept plugging on. Thankfully, my mom's a prepare-er and everything was pretty much already ready. The Hostess Committee began to trickle in with their phone flashlights and while some of us held them up the rest of us filled cups, set out dessert, washed up the few remaining dishes, and got everything ready. More church members and men began showing up with flashlights and torches and shining headlights in the glass doors of our very, very dark gym. At 10 til 6 everything was done, we had enough bobbing lights and a big spotlight shining on the ceiling to see, and we prayed and went through line. It was a sweet picture to me of how a body works - each person did a different job to make sure it all got done, even though we were all experiencing the same "handicap". The lights came back on at 6:30 and we were able to clean everything up, start church on time, and proceeded as normal!

ballgames

But kind of only the home games. Our little church ball team has picked back up! We didn't have enough high school boys for a couple of years but this year they all got together and aren't too bad! We have another game tonight and they're always a lot of fun! With not a whole lot of "just-for-fun" things this time of the year, it's an enjoyable way to spend a winter evening.

the things kids say

"Miss Kelley, that's a pretty necklace, where did you get it?"

"To be honest [three year old] Mabel, I don't remember, but thank you."

"You are welcome."

"Lena Rae, while your brothers have a boy party [with about 20 of their friends they've been talking our ears off about] do you want to come play with me and A?"

"No, I want to go to the party."

"But you're a little girl."

"No, I want to go to the boy party, I'm a little boy."

"You're three, Lena Rae, you have to go to class."

"I want to go to the nursery, I'm two today."

"Ok, kids, someone tell me what your favorite part about tonight was."

"I wish we had played freeze tag! If we had played freeze tag, that would have been my favorite part!"

february
Sometimes it's alarming how quickly time passes. It's scary that we miss so many opportunities and I hate feeling like I can't keep up. Somehow though, I've been enjoying the passage of time this year. I have high hopes for 2017, and it feels like each new month brings a whole set of new possibilities.

my office
I got a new desk and rug and completely re-decorated! Yet another welcome and happy change. I just need to print some pictures and buy a fake plant or two (I've killed every real plant I've touched).

warm quilts | new books | Georgia cornbread | Dougy hugs (the definition of a bear hug) | Lena Rae dimples | the little boys' excitement | warm, sunny days | fresh air | group texts | my oil diffuser (I've even got one in my office! It makes the entire bottom floor smell like Thieves oil) | finally having short hair again | late night conversation with friends after church | planning ANOTHER baby shower - this time for Faith!!  | Wednesday night class - I love being a teacher's helper! | old pictures & videos - I've been so blessed to have grown up with the people I have!

back during our trip to Germany 5 years ago - the reason I started this blog!

I hope you all have a very lovely February! What are some things you're loving this Thursday?

currently

It's 10:20pm and this is the first opportunity I've had today to get on my laptop. This post is as creative as I can get but a new years resolution is a new years resolution, and (at least until February) I'm determined to post every Thursday!

reading

Isaiah. Anyone else have trouble getting Genesis and January to align? I do the thing where I divide how many pages are in my Bible with 365, but it just never finishes exactly right. Sometimes I read extra, occasionally I don't get it all in, and sometimes I like to re-read passages. Whatever happened this time, I'm making my way through this book trying to pay extra attention this time and glean a little more. Please tell me I'm not the only one that goes slowly through the major prophets!

loving

Essential oils. Amie and I got Doterra diffusers for Christmas and my favorite one to diffuse right now is Thieves...or fighting five. It's the immune booster one, and no one's sick right now but I just love the scent! I have several blends but I want to get a few more individuals...does anyone have a favorite they'd like to recommend? I really want to try grapefruit soon. 

anticipating

Sunshine. It's been warm and rainy here which isn't the loveliest weather for January. I'd love some super low temps and snow, but a week of gray skies and foggy drives and wet everything, and right now all I can think about is warm sunshine.

grateful for

God's grace. An update on Collin - he came home the day after his crash to wait for the swelling in his face to go down - he even went to class this week and was at church Wednesday night! He had facial reconstructive surgery today and will probably get to go home late tomorrow afternoon. I can't think about it too much because I start crying every time. He really is a walking, talking miracle. He showed up in my office Wednesday night and as I hugged him I thanked God for the millionth time that he's still here. What a wake up call and reminder that Christ protects His children.

celebrating

Lena Rae. She turns three on Saturday - what?! For my birthday she gave me a night with just the two of us - coloring books, snacks, a movie and gift card to the candy store, and matching pj's. Her personality is so similar to mine at her age, and she and my nephews are growing up way too fast. I thought it was funny when my dad used to tell me he was going to put a brick on my head to make me stop growing...now I get it!

Have a wonderful weekend, everyone! I'll be back next week.

this thursday

Happy Thursday, everyone.

This Thursday I feel a bit more appreciative of life. I know I talk about my friends a lot on here, but it's because I realize it's a rare thing to have so many close ones, and I don't ever want to take that blessing in my life for granted.

Genuine friends that I've had many deep conversations with. Friends I've cried with, shared heartbreak with, prayed with, and experienced growing up with.

And yesterday, one of those friends was in a plane crash.

It's a little unique because he's a pilot and he was flying his own plane. Last summer he did a transcontinental flight for his senior thesis. My sister and several of our friends have flown with him.

He's ok - I guess I should have mentioned that already! He's having surgery sometime today because he has severe face trauma, but he got out of the plane and even called his dad right after he crashed.

But I was just on my laptop, paying a bill, when my mom came in and said "Collin has crashed his plane."

And for a second, it felt like everything paused. The same thing happened a lot last fall when my PawPaw was so terribly sick. Every time we got a phone call and I saw my aunts or uncle's number on the caller ID there was a pause. A moment of you're either about to give me some more information or you're going to crush my heart.

"He's bruised and bloody but he was coherent. They're life flighting him to Vanderbilt."

Vanderbilt means serious. Vanderbilt means a good place with amazing care.

And that night sitting in the sanctuary after church when most people had left, we were all on our phones (incredibly rare at our church, we don't even bring them inside most of the time) comparing text updates, getting informed, no longer overly worried, but concerned and grateful.

These are my people. And I know if something bad were to happen to me, it would be the same. Group texts, prayer requests and updates flying back and forth, pictures being sent to those not on social media, so much care and concern, but more than anything, so much prayer.

I wondered if it would be strange for me to post this for everyone to read, especially since every time I post something my friends text, email, or let me know somehow that they read it and especially loved such-and-such part of it. They also point out when I mention "a friend" told me or sent me something that they know who it was! But I truly am grateful for all of them, and I don't think it's weird for me to put that on here. They know. We don't act all awkward about how thankful we are for our friendships, and they know I love them. I do not ever want to take any of them for granted.
 

Please keep Collin and his family and girlfriend in your prayers as he goes through surgery today and the healing process afterwards. You can check out his "Vin Fiz 2" flight here - his plane, "Molly" is the one that crashed.