Week End Review

I thought I would try out a new series on here and see how it goes! Every weekend (either Friday, Saturday, or Sunday) I'll post pictures I've taken during the week. It seemed like good timing since all of our summer activities are over and we've started renovating our kitchen. It will help me keep track of the progress and keep everyone else updated! We'll see how it goes! :)

Sunday, August 3, one of my best friends had her first baby - little Amelia Kate! Because of the whole living in different states thing I haven't been able to meet her yet, but I can't wait to!! Just look at that adorable little girl!

As for the rest of the week...

laundry and breaking beans on a quiet afternoon

My mom did all the canning, not me!

Gnawing on an apple core feels good on teething gums!

I did, did you? :)

RENOVATION/ADDITION BEGINS:

tear out the back porch
dig footer 
(I don't even know what's next!)

See you next week, dear readers! Happy August!

Life is Good

“Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.”

Don’t you just love the quiet? The silence at the end of the day when you fall asleep deep in reflections. Whether you’re falling over in exhaustion or you’ve cried yourself to sleep or you’re not feeling well or you drift off with a smile on your face…don’t forget to count the things that were good in your day.

Tonight, I sit here in quiet reflection, and my heart is satisfied.

I wish I could put this feeling into words, but they just aren’t coming to me. I don’t know if it can be explained. I am content.

I have had heartbreaks, I have felt the pain of my friends and families heartbreaks.  I have been lonely and alone. I understand confusion and hurt. But I am satisfied.

I am me. I have grown and I am growing. I am not content to stay forever the same, but I am also ok with being myself. Having my own convictions and understanding those with differing ones. I know I can be steady and I know I can be happy. And I am. I am very happy.

I love. Yes, I am also loved, but I love. It is not enough to always take, it is wonderful to also give. There are so many people I love with all my heart. Some of them will never know it but it doesn’t matter. Because I love, I pray, and I feel united because those I love are praying too.

I don’t know who all reads this. I know some of you don’t know me and have never met me.

Above all, I am born again. Above all, I know and have a relationship with the One who created me to be all things to the best of my ability for His pleasure. Above all, I am His and He is mine. Forever. Eternally.

Tonight, I rest under the shadow of His wings. He is my rock and my fortress. I am happy and content. I want to share my happiness and spread it to everyone I know, and because of this, I write…because that’s what I do and that’s how I handle my “feelings”.  Peace. That’s what it is, and it’s taken me this many words to figure it out.

I am peaceful tonight. Happy. Content. Peaceful.

My heart is satisfied.

Our Fourth of July

"Remember the days of old, consider the years of many generations: ask thy father, and he will shew thee; thy elders, and they will tell thee." -Deuteronomy 32:7

After Christmas, I think the Fourth of July is my favorite holiday. It's about celebrating our freedom and it's cost and our American history, spending time with family, and relaxing. 

This year for Independence Day we celebrated on the fourth in Kentucky with our church family and other people at a tent meeting my dad preached. We took around 150 people from our church, and all combined there were about 500 people there! Our choir sang, my dad preached, a lady got saved, they served pizza and ice cream, and had fireworks! So much fun. :)

 

On the fifth, we had our big family celebration. Stephen and Tara are finally back in our state for good! They came over, and of course Jacob and his family did too. I'll caption some of the pictures, but you can see what we did fairly well without me writing a lot about it! (A picture is worth a thousand words...) We sat outside and ate and hung out for about five hours and had so much fun.

corn on the cob, baked beans, hamburgers and hotdogs, and chips

smoked jalapeno poppers

 

"Wheelie Poppin' Contest" - perfectly timed photo!

homemade butterfingers ice cream

What did you do for the Fourth of July? I hope everyone had a great day!

Not My Will

Written on Valentine's Day, but for some reason never posted. Oops!

Not my will, but yours be done, God.

Oh, the terrible fear that sometimes enters my heart when I release those words.

Did you know, it is not my will to be single this Valentine's Day? Did you know I almost broke down in WalMart today when I walked past the roses and balloons? I'm sure you could have guessed. It's not hard to imagine on this day, of all days.

This is not my will, but yours be done, Lord.

There are so many, many people - girls and guys - in the same place I am. Waiting and wondering if their dreams will ever become a reality, or if they're meant to simply be dreams, blowing away on the winds on time.

When will God's will miraculously morph into my will? When will I stop being selfish and give myself entirely to Him once and for all instead of having to do it multiple times throughout the day? When will I be ok with the fact that for 3 years running my life has looked exactly the same?

This is not my will! Yours be done, God.

What if His will is for me to be 45 years old, living in my parents' home, babysitting my nieces and nephews, and being the secretary at church?

That would not be my will. But if it's yours, Jesus, then let it be done. 

...and really, in the midst of His sovereign grace and goodness, would be be so bad?

I'll be honest with you, I don't want to be single anymore. Well, that's not 100% true, because I'm ok with it, as long as I can do some interesting things during this season of my life. Things like go on Missions Trips, travel to fun places... I'm not too picky.

It's the timeless fight against the old man.

I want change!

Be still.

I'm tired of everything being the same!

Be still.

Not my will? Right. Yours, Lord. Your will be done.

Gently, He shows me His patience with me. In those quiet moments when I get to be alone, just reading or thinking or writing. Those moments that I won't always have once I'm not single, moments to myself that are precious gifts to remind me that there is great contentment in the solitary.  And I realize I love these moments, and one day it will be hard for me to give them up...yes, it's been this way for going on three years, but I have come to love parts of this single life so much. Gentle reminders.

The hard moments are when I go to a wedding or a baby shower and then I leave and I come home and I sit alone in my room feeling jealous. In those moments, my life - and even my attitude -  is not my will.

And that's when He lets me daydream. Planning my own home in my mind. Naming children I dream up in the nurture-bent heart that He's given me.

I am not alone in this battle. Whatever plans you have for yourself - whether God-honoring or not - when they aren't coming to pass, it's hard to let them go. We feel like we have to negotiate with God, "Lord, I would honor you in my marriage, you know I would!" "God, I would raise my children to praise and love you, haven't I proven that to you?" Whatever you're waiting on, there must be a purpose behind the trial, a reason behind the tears. It's hard to remind ourselves of this and it gets old and tiresome, but it's not our will that matters. "Lord, it's your will that matters the most."

I don't know why it's so hard to wait. I don't know why God does the things He does or chooses the timing He chooses.

Some people say when you get to the point where you love God enough, He'll allow whatever you've been so desperately praying for to happen. But we can never love God enough. We can only strive to please Him and work to love Him more each day.

That's my biggest goal for 2014, and I thought it appropriate to share on Valentine's Day.

Release my will, and accept His with open arms. His is so much safer, and all of us can rest and accept whatever it is as long as we have His comforting security.

So as I sit here, alone, 21, single....on Valentine's Day. Again.

It's not my will. Jesus, it's yours.

"Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass."

As long as I am happy serving Him, He will change my desires to match His, and I will be happier in His will that I could ever be in my own...and this is when His will morphs into mine!

mini recap | april pictures

April! Sunshine and open windows and trading our sweaters for short sleeves. Opening those closets and cabinets and SPRING CLEANING! I took it one day at a time and gutted my closet, bathroom, and dresser drawers. I still have a ton of things to get rid of, but I'm 98% there. Yay!

April was also the month of meetings here, meetings there, meetings everywhere! My dad preached all over Tennessee, Kentucky, and Alabama (not really though haha). We went with him as much as we could, and counting trying to keep halfway normal work schedules....well. Anyway.

I didn't take that many pictures, and the calender was too jumbled up to make anything out clearly, so this month is just a mini version of my normal recaps. You get pictures and maybe, maybe....maybe a short description on a few. We'll see. ;)

Girl's Night with Tara! Finally! :)

Benji:

We had a cow die in April shortly after giving birth to this calf so we had to bottle feed it, and we still are. My brother decided to name him Benji, after Benjamin in the Bible whose mother died after having him, too. It's a cute little thing, and somehow I got roped into feeding it whenever my mom's too busy. It was rainy and cold when we first started, and my mom had to get that picture of me (those of you that know me know that this is quite an abnormal thing for me to do. However, this calf is cute and we have a good relationship. ;) ) The boys love him, and Jace has got to feed him, too. We're still going at it everyday at 7:00am and 7:00pm!

I got my hair cut! It doesn't look super duper different, but I got several inches cut off. It was sort of a sad day, but my hair was in really bad shape and it needed help. I've come to love it though - and just in time for this hot weather we've been having!

Easter Sunday:

Something's not right with this picture.... ;) My dad got a black eye just in time for Easter! I love these pictures because they make me laugh. The Wednesday before, my dad was playing basketball with one of the teen guys from church. His head hit my dad's face and a black eye was left behind...for a week at least - it's still a little discolored now! The whole side of his face was swollen, and I feel so sorry for the boy that did it - accidents happen, this one just left behind some obvious evidence!

...and that's all you get for April! ;) It's been so busy around here, and this is just all I've had time for (and it's gotten done over the course of a week - yikes!)

I hope you've had a good May so far, I'm looking forward to things calming down for a minute or two! I know all of you in school are excited about being out for the summer - May reminds me that new chapters are beginning every day. Happy Spring!!